Time

Time can be more then one thing. It can drag on and seem to take forever. Time can get away from you and you will find yourself wondering where it went. Your life gets so busy you miss out on things you never thought you would miss.

My time is being cut short with someone very important in my life. My great grandma who is 89 and was diagnosed with Alzheimer's a few years ago. Thursday September 15th 2011 they told us that she only has 3 days to live. I was devastated because as my life has been going on I have not even seen her for almost a year. The last time i saw her was over Christmas for our family Christmas. She was sitting up and talking to all of us and she was confused a little but she still remembered us. I feel horrible about myself because I used to live a few blocks from he nursing home she is living at and I was always "to busy" to go visit her. Now that my time is running out, very quickly, I am scrambling for TIME to see her. I feel like I missed out on so much. Now all I do is pray for more time. Lost time can never be made up and memories can not be made. I cant go visit her and make up years of time.

I went to see her the very next day after I found out she didn't have a lot of time left. I really just wanted to see her and hold her hand. I went with my mom because I knew that I could not handle going by myself. I knew she cant remember a lot of things and people but I really just wanted to see if she remembered me. I asked her one thing that I knew she might remember but was not sure. I asked her "Grandma do you remember the time I came to stay with you over the summer?" She said "oh ya".

This one year she kept asking me when I was going to come stay with her. Well I never had any time to because I was so busy with running and my friends. Plus she lived near Harlan so that was a long drive. So when the time came for me to go to the Harlan cross country came in 2007 I called her up and asked if I could come stay with her one night so that I would not have to get up so early in the morning for this came and drive almost an hour. So of course she said she would love to have me come out and stay. So my mom dropped me off at her house and visited for a bit and then left. I remember it being dinner time so she took me over to this little diner that they had in town and she bought me dinner and a snickers ice cream bar. We went back to her house and I remember that she just wanted to watch her soap operas. So around 8:00 pm she was ready for bed. HOLY COW it was still light out. I was wide awake but I went to lay down anyway. I remember thinking that I was glad I had my Ipod because the house was silent and the room was freezing.

I finally fell asleep and at 6:00 am ya super early she woke me up. I had about 2 hours left until my friend came to get me. So I ate breakfast and we watched more soap operas. My friend finally came to get me and I said good bye. For months after that she could not stop talking about how much fun we had and she kept saying this is "My Jen."

I wish that I would have taken more out of that time with her then I did. Rather then wishing time went faster, I wish I would have looked at that time with her differently. I only regret that I didn't make more time for her.

So for everyone that might read this I will let you know that I am so glad that we are given notice of this so that we can spend as much time with her as we want before its her time to go. I look at things now like this might be the last time i will see you and that tomorrow might not come. Live each day like its your last day. I never want to regret anything so learn from everything.

Our family is in need of a lot of love and prayers. We are going through a hard time. I will be sad when the time does come but I know that she will no longer be suffering and that she will be back with her husband and that she will be happy again.

My Kindle

So for my birthday all i really wanted was either the Nook of the Kindle. Whichever one I got I would have been happy with. So my parents got me the Kindle which I absolutely am In Love with!! My birthday was a few months ago so I have had it for a while. I look online everyday and get free books all the time some really interesting others not so much.

I recently read and finished this book called "Perfect on Paper: The (Mis)Adventures of Waverly Bryson". I could not put this book down. I lost a lot of time in my day reading this book. I even brought it to work and was looking forward to free anytime I had so I could read. I LOVE a book that can grab me and keep me the whole story.

On amazon, which the Kindle is from, they have daily recommendations for you based upon the things you have bought or looked at and had interest in.

I LOVE books that can grab you and get you emotionally involved.I have had books make me cry and laugh so hard I almost pee my pants. The worst thing is when I am at work and people stare at me and wonder what the heck I am doing.

There was this one book that I thought would be a fantastic book because it was true storied about the emergency room and in the ambulance. Its called "Emergency Laughter". I like reading real life stories because I like seeing how crazy other peoples lives are. So i previewed the book and let me just say the very first story I read made me almost throw up. I was laughing at the other stories after but was very hesitant to read them because of the story I had just read. I am 100% certain that no other book I have ever read has ever made me want to throw up so bad. I always thought I had a somewhat strong stomach but after reading this I am not so sure.

I love reading because you never know what you are going to get when you pick up a book!

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I had the blessing of attending "Women of Faith" at the Quest Center with Susie and Bonnie on friday night! It was so much fun and even though I didn't know any of the worship songs it was still so awesome to be there!

One thing, out of so many, i took from there was that we all care so much about what other people think. I was sitting there listening and really thinking this time about that question because I am always wondering what people think about me.

Why is it that we care so much?

I started thinking about all those things. I should not care. I mean I am the way God created me and this is how he wants me to be. I am perfect in his eyes. Still i doubt myself but ask that question all the time. I also thought about not just myself but about Faith. Some people can talk about their Faith for days and days but other people I think are not afraid but worried about being judged because they believe in something that not everyone agrees with.

Why is it that Faith seems so hard to talk about? Are people afraid to accept Faith when they have none or they think theirs is the only way?


But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.”
1 Samuel 16:7


So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.
Genesis 1:27

My RUG RATS

So as many already know, I have 2 babies! There names are Baby and Jax.

Baby is 7 years old and we got here 2 years ago and Jax is 4 months old almost 5 and we got him just a few weeks ago.

Today we have to take them in to get them shots :( which i am not excited about because they are going to be mad at me and cry and I dont like to see my babies hurt and cry. I hate getting shots so I know it will not feel good. Luckily Brad is going to go with me for support lol. The first time I had to take Baby in to get her shots it was horrible. She was scared of everything and she did not like the vet. Oh man was she ever mad at me.

The thing that always grosses me out is that we have to grab there poop and bring it with us. EWWWW and its not like you get there and they take it from you. Oh no they have to make you sit and wait with your dogs crap.

Now that Baby is older and more comfortable, she thinks she is a BIG dog. She likes to go up to actual big dogs and sniff them and growl at them. The bigger dogs are always like really you are the size of my poop, why are you trying to mess with me. Well so this trip should be interesting.

Jax loves to play and Baby will not have it. She just wants to lay there and not be bothered. Jax is a puppy so sometimes Baby will play but thats only for like 2 seconds. She is not a fan.

I have not experienced Jax at the vet yet so i am nervous. They ask you to hold the dog and then your babies look at you like why are you letting them hurt me and then they cry. Makes me sad.

So I guess we will just see how today goes.

Starting Out

So everyone I know has started blogging so I thought I would give it a try. I am not sure exactly what i am going to blog about but as my blog title says its going to be random so GET READY cause here we go!!!!!